Am I the only one?

[Henrysix]

My mother died suddenly July 2019, my younger brother could not have been more useless, at the funeral he settled the bar and food bill as agreed and slapped the receipt down in front of me and others saying, right sort this, he had no involvement with the coroners court, register of death, tying up affairs or dealing with the grave stone , he was dire, when she was alive I told her that after she had gone I would have nothing to do with him, that is exactly what the situation is, I know I bleat on about looking after everyone but he is beyond that as far as I am concerned, he had a christening for his daughter 20 years ago and did not even tell us, 18 years ago the old feller passed away he was useless then, and left it all to us, and to cap it all my first granddaughter Beatrix was born sleeping (stillbirth) in late June of this year, even that did not prompt contact, so the last time I saw him was at my mothers funeral 2019, he is a right piece of work!

Sorry for all that whinge over!

[banjo]

henrysix,been there ,seen it,done it.i think we have the same brother,and as for his mrs multiply his behavior by a thousand and you are not even close.anyone who knows me knows that I am a level headed decent bloke and I don't speak ill of anyone but there are circumstances beyond our control sometimes.i have left them out of my life and am all the better for it.last saw them at mums funeral where they never spoke to anyone and never had the decency to thank relatives for coming to pay their respects even though some of them had travelled long distances to be there.

[Henrysix]

Banjo
Not just me then, never mind, BELL, BIRD, FISH, TREE,

I have given them all every chance, I told her, she knew it was true and I meant it, only time I will ever give up, but there ye go

[motman]

H6
I think we all have them. I dealt with my mum's funeral in Glasgow, as she was divorced from my dad, being the eldest (and living in Switzerland), but he seriously got in the way (conscience and all that). My brother and sister didn't help at all. So I told them they could deal with the auld man when it was his turn. When it happened my brother dealt with it, but seriously fell out with my sister, and the've not spoken to each other since - 11 years ago.

[The Creeping Spleen]

It's a weird coincidence though. I've known the funeral director guy's younger brother for the better part of thirty years.

[Henrysix]

Spleen can you get us all a wee discount

[Henrysix]

As an engineer I would be happiest to go on a hole in the road underneath the gas mains preferably,I used to say I wanted to be buried in the attacking 6yd box at Ibrox, which means they would have to dig me up and re-bury me at every half time and twice again in extra time!

[The Creeping Spleen]

Mornin' folks.

Pleased to report that mum's funeral went well.

Nice wee service, led by out meenister Rev. Karen Harbinson. No singing of hymns, not allowed under current restrictions. But we had recordings played and you could hear folk mumbling along quietly.

"Love Divine, All Loves Excelling" was a performance by youngest niece's school choir, and "The Lord's My Shepherd" was a solo piece by youngest niece on her flute. Both were recordings as I said.

Including myself and immediate family, there were perhaps a dozen or so of us in attendance.

Currently got the order of service booklet propped up on my desk, cos the front cover is a nice photo of mum.

All in all, I'm doing ok. Taking things day by day.

[Henrysix]

Spleen - well done son, a fitting departure, she won’t be forgotten, lovely to hear of your talented young family doing their bit for the head of the clan, fair puts a wee tear in your eye, remember the good times son, she’s still with you, mothers always are!

[The Creeping Spleen]

It's kind of got me thinking a wee bit about my own mortality.

I'm not the religious type, so I don't know what music I'd like played.

Quite partial to Michael Kamen's main theme from "Band of Brothers", and there's a track called "Wander My Friends" from the 2004 series of Battlestar Galactica that I love.
It's sung in Irish Gaelic, and sounds vaguely like "The Minstrel Boy".

Then to get everyone smiling as they leave the crematorium, either "Bring Me Sunshine" by Morcambe and Wise, or "Goodbyeeee" by Peter Cook and Dudley Moore.

[Dot]

Creeping Spleen,

Glad everything went to plan at the funeral and as you say just take things a day at a time.

It's always good to have a nice photo in these circumstances.
After my Dad died in January 2018 I came across a lovely photo of him and his sister when they were young children.
It's black and white but I got a copy of it made at chemist and it's in a nice frame.
My aunt died a few years before my Dad.
We had another photo of my Dad on Order of service which many admired.

Talking of music I was at a funeral last year and after the church service was over they played 'Always look on the bright side
of life'. I believe it was a favourite according to the man's family.
I think it made a lot of people smile and people were singing it on their way out.

[Henrysix]

It’s just one of those feet tapping whistling tunes isn’t it, a novel way to leave a funeral

[banjo]

at my dads we had mr Saturday dance followed by Chattanooga choo choo and finished off with in the navy.well he did spend seven years at sea with the royal navy.at mums we had wheel of fortune and sunshine on leith.

[Henrysix]

Good stuff my son Kieran played Blackbird and Here Comes The Sun medley on an acoustic guitar flawlessly, the celebrant said afterwards that this was a first for her snd just added that little something extra,

Think I would choose “When I live My Dream” by Bowie as my marching out tune!

[The Creeping Spleen]

We're going to let the dust settle (possibly until after Christmas and New Year are over with) before we start tackling mum's clothes, effects and assorted nick nacks.

Her fur coat - which I believe was an anniversary present from dad back when they were first married - is going to be problematic. No one wears fur any more after all.
I think there's some specialist companies that deal with such things? So I'll look into that.

We're still deciding where (eventually) to scatter mum and dad's ashes, but I spoke to my brother earlier and suggested the when.#
August 26th next year. What would've been their 60th wedding anniversary.