arseholes on wheels

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arseholes on wheels

Postby north glasgow dave » Fri Feb 11, 2011 9:38 am

as requested by lucky poet
an anti cyclist thread...has anyone noticed how cyclicts are manky bastards with a grudge against other road users..
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Re: arseholes on wheels

Postby hungryjoe » Fri Feb 11, 2011 10:07 am

I can't comment on the mankiness, but cyclists often are selfish bastards. I've forgotten how many times I've been held up by two cyclists riding abreast.
Don't get me started on cycling clubs. What's the collective for a bunch of fannies? I'll try, a fud of fannies, two and three abreast and maybe 20 or 30 feet long, pissing about at 25 mph on a main road. Fucking wankers.
As a bus driver, it used to drive me mental when, while sitting at a red light, they'd come fannying about up my inside, so that when the light turned green, I had to give most of my attention to not knocking some prickhead off his bike, rather on whatever else was going on. I was told by my PSV driving instructor, that as far as the police were concerned, if I knocked a cyclist off his bike in those circumstances, it was my fault, regardless of legality.
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Re: arseholes on wheels

Postby Dexter St. Clair » Fri Feb 11, 2011 3:15 pm

hungryjoe wrote:Id three abreast and maybe 20 or 30 feet long, pissing about at 25 mph on a main road. Fucking wankers.
As a bus driver, it used to drive me mental when, while sitting at a red light, they'd come fannying about up my inside, so that when the light turned green



as a fuckin' bus driver you have no opinion of value in any discussion on driving other than advising the pensioners that drive black hacks. Rude to passengers , belligerent with other drivers , fond of taking short cuts which involve taking the roof aff your vehicle and tapping bus conductors for money are there any redeeming aspects to bus drivers. The worst behaved passengers when off duty then again when do they get in a bus other than to stand at the front distracting the driver and blocking the door for passengers. You canny overtake a phalanx of cyclists , what do you feel like no when you get behind a bendy bus.
"I before E, except after C" works in most cases but there are exceptions.
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Re: arseholes on wheels

Postby mmd » Fri Feb 11, 2011 3:40 pm

Always a contentious issue. Both motorists and cyclists are guilty of causing problems and being selfish road users and I've seen plenty of bad examples from both.

This link is worth checking out to see what cyclists sometimes have to put up with:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-12330181

This guy that puts these videos on YouTube has lots of examples of bad cycling
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GBDN15PO ... playnext=1
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Re: arseholes on wheels

Postby Vinny the Mackem » Fri Feb 11, 2011 4:10 pm

hungryjoe wrote:What's the collective for a bunch of fannies? I'll try, a fud of fannies


A clique of clits?

Too much?? ::):
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Re: arseholes on wheels

Postby rabmania » Fri Feb 11, 2011 4:11 pm

mmd wrote:Always a contentious issue. Both motorists and cyclists are guilty of causing problems and being selfish road users and I've seen plenty of bad examples from both.

This link is worth checking out to see what cyclists sometimes have to put up with:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-12330181

This guy that puts these videos on YouTube has lots of examples of bad cycling
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GBDN15PO ... playnext=1


I didn't think this thread would feature such a moderate comment, thank you.
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Re: arseholes on wheels

Postby BrigitDoon » Fri Feb 11, 2011 4:23 pm

There's a pub I know with a short disabled ramp that leads into the bar. The bar itself runs along the wall to the left as you walk in.

A Kiwi of my acquaintance, halfway through a pub crawl, cycled up the ramp, through the open door and pulled up alongside the bar.

"Pint of Guinness, please, mate!"

"Certainly sir, that'll be £3.45. If you'll just park the bicycle in the rack provided outside..."
UXB
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Re: arseholes on wheels

Postby the researcher » Fri Feb 11, 2011 4:49 pm

as a member of the Veteran Cycle Club (Scottish Section) i would like to say that we behave correctly and within the rules of the highway code as this is a condition of membership we use mainly back roads where there is little traffic or cycle paths we usually used back roads or cycle paths and are safe riders so please dont pigeon hole all cyclists in the category arseholes on wheels
THE FLYING SCOT MADE BY RATTRAYS IN GLASGOW THE BEST BICYCLE EVER MADE
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Re: arseholes on wheels

Postby hungryjoe » Fri Feb 11, 2011 6:20 pm

[quote="Dexter St. Clair" You canny overtake a phalanx of cyclists[/quote]
Eggs fucking actly. So why do the fucking imbeciles fanny about in phalanxes? Because they are fucking selfish fannies, that's why.


You have no idea what I was like as a bus driver, and you have no idea what drivers have to put up with.

Have you any idea why bus drivers have protective screens? I do.
The screens were fitted as a direct result of someone trying to murder me with a hatchet.
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Re: arseholes on wheels

Postby potatojunkie » Fri Feb 11, 2011 6:25 pm

hungryjoe wrote:The screens were fitted as a direct result of someone trying to murder me with a hatchet.


hungryjoe wrote:You have no idea what I was like as a bus driver


I'm going to go out on a limb and say "lovable"?
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Re: arseholes on wheels

Postby hungryjoe » Fri Feb 11, 2011 6:34 pm

potatojunkie wrote:
hungryjoe wrote:The screens were fitted as a direct result of someone trying to murder me with a hatchet.


hungryjoe wrote:You have no idea what I was like as a bus driver


I'm going to go out on a limb and say "lovable"?


I think only my maw would think me lovable. I was attacked because the Conductress - 33 years service, and Corporation blood in her veins, wouldn't hand over money while we were victims of an attempted armed robbery. The cunt with the hatchet made for me and managed to break every window surrounding my cabin, while I was doing something like this:
Imageonly speeded up.
Fucking terrifying to be honest.
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Re: arseholes on wheels

Postby Sharon » Fri Feb 11, 2011 8:20 pm

This is depressing.

Thankyou rab for a few sane words.

I love cycling but I am too nervous to cycle on Glasgows roads because of Daves.
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Re: arseholes on wheels

Postby rabmania » Fri Feb 11, 2011 10:05 pm

Sharon wrote:This is depressing.

Thankyou rab for a few sane words.

I love cycling but I am too nervous to cycle on Glasgows roads because of Daves.


There are a few 'Daves', but most drivers are fine. I commute by bike every day, at various times of the day and night, and have few problems, so long as I take up a sensible position a metre from the kerb (just in case I need to swerve to the left). White van man and those who think that overtaking means just scraping my handle bars are the worst, but they are few. First Bus drivers are the best, they give cyclists space, and bar just the one recently, they respond with gentlemanly gestures to me when I move aside for them or when I wave them back out into the traffic. They've had good training about cyclists I reckon, and it shows.
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Re: arseholes on wheels

Postby Josef » Fri Feb 11, 2011 10:11 pm

Thank you, Rab. I second Sharon's comment, as I'm sure Lucky Poet will do.
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Split Arses On Wheels

Postby scaryman2u » Fri Feb 11, 2011 10:24 pm

Sharon, you have thrown a spanner in the spokes here, I need to ask Doorstop if spit-arses are included in this debate :P
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